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note #18: June 18th roughly 20:10-20:55pm across the field of grass and alfalfa

Engulfed by the earth

Alive

Encompassed by the sky

Alive

Words shrink to

Amazing!

Beautiful!

Fuck. faaak!

Really?

Wow! Wow? Wow.

Language is young

Arrogant

Separate

In the center of as far as my eyes can see my ears can hear my skin can feel

My mind fails to really understand and my body takes over

Visceral

(i understand--my mind needs to be involved)

In the center of my experience

My language becomes animal

Aaahhhhs

ooohhh hhh

mmmm m m m mm nnnn n n g g shshsh shs hhhhhh

silence

And then

Extra heart beats

Heart expansions

Stomach churnings

Skin tinglings

Eyes waterings

Air exploding into sighs

If it were not for all the bloody insects

Would i shed all the humanly objects

My shoes off and socks and bra

My eyeglasses

My phone my wallet

Off off off

Everything

grass blades growing covering toes ankles calves knees

growing stinging thorns to fend off the bees?

Grasshoppers checking out the new terrain

Moss grows between my legs and armpits behind my ears

And language ceases to have meaning

My mind stops fighting

My fingers interlace with alfalfa my toes disappear

And night setssilence

And then

Extra heart beats

Heart expansions

Stomach churnings

Skin tinglings

Eyes waterings

Air exploding into sighs

If it were not for all the bloody insects

Would i shed all the humanly objects

My shoes off and socks and bra

My eyeglasses

My phone my wallet

Off off off

It got dark

And i could hear all the small sounds

The creeping lives

I feel hungry

Thirsty

I need the toilet

I will watch another episode

Check in on my friend if she got home yet

One bite too many

I turn around and go inside knowing

There will never be another night like this one

When i return next time i will stay a minute longer

And maybe i will get my chance

If i dare

If the night is still here

To earth to sky to blend to be

tomorrow

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